I feel that much of the sexism underlying STEM is illustrated in how you are treated on a day to day basis, rather than isolated vignettes of individual attacks. One of the side-effects of being a woman in STEM is that your male colleagues/classmates will comment on your appearance (in a more pointed way than they do with each other). It becomes clear that many have conflicting views of what a woman should look like, and what a woman in engineering should look like, but it sounds okay and not malicious because they’re “joking” about it.
– being asked if I’m “slumming it” one day when I was dressed more casually than normal (his dress code is not exactly on par)
– comments on my hair length — “what’s with the boy hair”, “maybe one day your hair’ll get short enough and you can pass for a guy”
and on the flip side, when I (or other female classmates) wear a skirt, cosmetics, etc., we’ll be asked “who are you trying to impress” or “got a hot date”.
And yet, when called out on it, accusations of sexism are roundly denied…